Sofia Alejandra, The Crazed Icewing Rogue (Ready for Review!)

Type of Character: Dragon  
Link to Character List Page: Here's the link; http://www.rpgdragons.org/t5425-sofia-alejandra-s-characters

Personal Info
Name: Sofia Alejandra
Alias: The Serial Killer, or Sofia, or Alejandra
Age: 42
Gender: Female    
Personality: Ever since she was trapped in an old, forgotten dungeon, she made it her number one goal to kill every Icewing. She is an angry dragon. She believes that the Icewings heard her pleas for help, but never wanted to help her. She became enraged. Before the incident, 40 years earlier, she was a happy dragon with many playmates. She always loved treasure.
Fears: She fears death (duh...), but she fears (and hates) the Icewing and Earthwing tribes. She knows what they are capable of, so she prefers to attack at night. She is also afraid of fire. She is an Icewing who lived in a dungeon for 40 years, so she never saw fire. It frightens her a lot.
Strengths: She is very stealthy and quick. She needed to be if she wants to escape the Icewing territory quickly. She is also very smart.
Weaknesses: She is super thin, because there was no food in the dungeon. She can also be quit reckless at times. She is very tall and easy to spot as well.

General Appearance
Height: 72 feet
Scales: A beautiful silver color, her scales are larger than normal scales (and a little more dense). She prefers to call them "plates".
Eyes: Her eyes are a dark vantablack (the darkest color on Earth so far.), shaped like little beads.
Appearance: She looks like a hunk of silver from far away. she has weird webbed things at her tail. She carries a dry ice butterfly knife in a little brown leather satchel on her waist. She also wears an earring with a Star Sapphire, dangling from her left ear.

Tribe Information and Status
Tribe: Formerly Icewings, but after the incident, she turned rogue.
Inheritance: She is 71.6% Icewing, 28.4% Nightwing
Rank: A Rogue.
Family: N/A (Deceased)
Mate: N/A
Hatchlings: N/A

Skills and Abilities
Normal Abilities: She can withstand cold temperatures. She also has an ice breath reaching -90 degrees Celsius. She is partially nocturnal, hence being part Nightwing.
Special Abilities: She can make a thick snow fall from the clouds. This attack is defensive, not offensive (It does NOT hurt). It is mainly used as a getaway. This attack can be used every 5 posts.
Combat Style: She likes the idea of brains beats brawn. She attacks and kills when others are asleep, so there really is no fight. If she is caught, she will usually aggravate them, which causes them to charge straight at her. She will then jump and land on their back, pinning them down with the kinetic energy from the decent. Then she cracks their neck. After they are dead she will make the body look like it is in agony, or screaming in pain.


Background
History: The picture above is a picture of her at 2 years old. This is before the incident. She loved playing with her friends and having fun. One day, she wandered out too far. A bulky looking Earthwing, grabbed her and threw her into an old dungeon. It was covered in frost and bones of all kinds. The Earthwing chained her up, and pushed a giant boulder over the one entrance/exit. She came to the conclusion that that Earthwing had to be Baldirak Sapiens Draco (It really wasn't). She stayed in that dungeon for 21 years until the shackles broke. She couldn't move the boulder, she wasn't strong enough. She waited 19 more years, until she was almost as big as the boulder. She then, pushed it away to reveal the sunlit tunnel to the outside. She then decided to become a mass murderer to the Earthwings, but mostly the Icewings, who she believed heard her, but didn't care to help her.

Hi there and welcome to DRF!

So I've noticed that you mention a few times that she is a "Formerly a Hatchling, now a Rogue". Does this mean she is a Hatchling? Because if so, you need to lower her age and height. If you just mean that she was a Hatchling when she left the tribe, then under Rank, since she is a Rogue now, you need only put Rogue or N/A.

Under fears and combat style, you put that she prefers to attack at night. Even if she is very stealthy, this would be extremely difficult, as she has no NightWing heritage. As far as seeing at night goes, NightWings are like Owls, whereas the other species are like Humans. So unless you make her part NightWing, you'll have to remove the attacking at night thing.

Also, being afraid of death is a rather obvious fear, so if you could add another fear or replace it, that would be good.

Let me know when you're finished making the changes above and/or have any questions.

Well, I put hatchling because she was a hatchling at the time of her disappearance. When she disappeared, she couldn't move up ranks. So, she was never a Trainee or a guardian or anything else. That is why I put hatchling.

I will fix everything else though!

(Sorry, wrong alt...)

Oh, this is an alt? Well, then, let me tell you how to do the character link thing. Basically, all you do is make a topic in the Character Registration section with a list of all the (approved) characters you have, with links to their apps. Once that's done, you copy the link to that page and post it under Link to Character List page, whenever you make a new character.

And gotcha. But seeing as she isn't in a Tribe anymore, and Hatchling isn't really a rank, there's no need to mention it under Rank, as she's now an adult.

What do you mean by, "she is partially nocturnal"? And how is that an ability? Also, at being only 8.4% NightWing, it's unlikely she'd have any pronounced NightWing traits. Might want to make her NightWing heritage higher than that.

Ok, I fixed everything you listed. Please contact me if you find any more errors!

Now that she is no longer a purebred, we'll have to adjust her abilities. She won't be able to withstand cold temperatures as well as a purebred IceWing, so make sure you mention that. Her ice breath wouldn't be able to reach -90 celsius, either.

You still need to explain what you mean by her being partially nocturnal, since NightWings aren't necessarily nocturnal by nature.

And I noticed you mentioned my character in your history. Since they've never met, you should remove that.