Fortune Teller! It's easy and fun!

First topic message reminder :

So, this magical pikechu below is a fortune teller. It will tell you your future by you listing random words, phrases, and events. Lets show an example!
Ex. Murder, pigs, sleepover party, The cake is a Lie.
Fortune: You will murder a bunch of baby pigs because while you are at a sleepoever party, you will be told that The cake is a lie. This makes you go crazy and murder the baby piggies. You evil little thing.
Lets start!
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(^.^) ()
(___)/
^Magical pikachu

Phantom, your future is.....
One day, an army of dumpling will rise, trying to claim the land that was once theirs back from the turtle dragon. So far, this army was msade up of Snowfall, Shardas, and Phantom the dumplings. All of them rolled down the hill, singing their national anthem, "Everything is Awesome" song. Their faces of derpiness shined strong, as they rolled down the hill and sang their song. Then the dumplings stopped to a quick halt. They saw Natsu Dragneel, Lavi, and Monkey D. Luffy having a picnic. They tried to roll back up the hill, but it was too late. Suddenly a thing stabbed dumpling Shardas head, right before he was stuffed inside of Luffy's mouth. Then, anothe thing scooped up Snowfall the dumpling, for as she was eaten whole. Unfortunately for Phantom the dumpling, she got her face cut off, then was stabbed rapidly multiple times. She was still alive, although living became painful for her. She got stabbed constantly as the blade pierced right through her body, and started to rip her insides to shreds. A strang red liguid came out of this dumpling. Right bofore her dying breath, she grabbed a piece of paper, and in her blood she wrote Cosmos's name. She then threw up her brains up it, and with her dying breath outlined it with crayons. The humans seeing this were extremely disturbed, so they threw up their dumplings although they were already half-way digested. The three corpses of the dumpling lay in the grass at the foot of a hill, leting the sun bake them and keep them warm.
WHAT DID YOU DO?

A thing
Natsu Dragneel
Lavi
Monkey D. Luffy

Wing
Scissors
Paper
Thread
Baby
Pants

Go! Amuse me.

Bananas, fire, Castle, Cards, shoes

Go on make us laugh ;3

A hippo
Everyone on the "top posting users this month" list
A giant smiley face
Nyan cat
HOMEWORK SUCKS

I'm doing this again, too:

Turtle
Leather Shoes
Yugi
A random person
Lava
Jackalope
The awesome smiley face ()
The troll face ()

I shall try!
Potatoes
Shiningwater
Waffles
Greystripe is tacky( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydQZ0qKifhQ )
Phantom as a potato
Jadespine as a waffle
A stop sign
Behemoth
An annoying little sister
This-

IMPRESS ME OR DIE!!!

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(O.O) ()
(___)/
You demand too many fortunes! I am afraid that my power ran out. Cya again June 13 2015!

Frost was that a joke or what? XD if you could do my fortunes you can do theirs!

DO IT

BEHOLD! THE MAGIC TROLL HAS COME TO TELL UR FORTUNES AND HELP THE MAGIC PIKACHU!

Solstice:

When a baby threatened to use scissors on the world, everyone took off their pants and ran around like crazy people. Suddenly, I guy grabbed someone's wing and threw him at a wall, at which point he lost a thread that had been hanging off his shirt, and Death the Kid killed the man for being asymmetrical.

Kazumi:

When life decided to be a hippo, everyone on the top posting users this month list went crazy. In fact, so crazy, they called Death the Kid and asked him to be a hippo. Kid, annoyed, replied that was pointless, and hung up. Everyone went insane since Kid had denied them, so a giant smiley face started to take over the world with an army of Nyan cats. That was when one of the members on the list declared homework sucks and jumped off a cliff.

Phantom:

Once upon a time, a random person walked up to Death the Kid. The random person asked Death the Kid if he could borrow some leather shoes, to which point Kid replied that his leather shoes were too spontaneously amazing for any mere mortal to comprehend. This caused the random person to turn into a jackalope when he gazed upon their glory, and he hopped away to tell his friends about the glorious shoes. Yugi, hearing about the amazing shoes, decided to run up to Death the Kid's house and steal them. While sneaking around his house, he realized that it was guarded by the awesome smiley face, which shot lava from its mouth, and Yugi ran for his life. He bumped into Death the Kid, and took out a pistol, and started shooting him. Kid then got the troll face and make Yugi explode, while a turtle watched in the background.

Scourge:

One day, Shiningwater declared that an army of potatoes was approaching. Shocked, The master waffle commander, Jadespine, called in an annoying little sister to help her plan how to defeat the waffles. But the annoying little sister was annoying, so she decided to watch Graystipe is tacky instead. This made Jadepine angry, and she summoned her army of waffles to help her combat the army of potatoes. As she marched down to the battle field, she realized the leader of the potatoes was Phantom. Angry at Phantom for being a potato, Jadespine the waffle threw a stop sign at Phantom, who magically deflected it with magic. This made Jadespine flip a table in rage, before she wildly charged at Phantom. Before she could get to Phantom, though, Death the Kid riding a Behemoth showed up, and threw Jadespine a million miles away, leaving Phantom the victor.

OMG THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! YOU ARE SO AMZING THANK YOU! MAGIC PIKACHU WILL RETURN OCTOBER 25 2014! CYA AROUND!
These fortunes will be slightly halloween themed.

THE MAGIC TROLL SHALL ANSWER YOUR FORTUNES Until THEN!

Warning, fortunes may be slightly Death the Kid themed.

bananas, rayla, and gundams (google it)

DO IT, IT IS SIMPLE

Nothing, everything and anything.

I will do some simple fortunes, nice and quick yes yes.
Akre:
Rayla made a banana rocket ship thats interior was made completetly out of gundam modles(your talking about the action figures the keroro plays with in sgt frog right?).

Scourage:
A post that said

Nothing, everything and anything.

happened.